Our Greatest and Loving Dad’s 49th Day

18^th January 2008 (Friday) marked the 49^th day of my dearest Dad’s passing. Forty-nine days. It’s been REALLY hard for me, I’m trying to move on, but it just doesn’t seem to get any easier. 

We had two prayer sessions for him yesterday.  One prayer was done at my parents’ home and one at  Buddhist Society. I believe all the prayers and chanting will see my dearest Dad through his new and peaceful path. Time flies!!I can’t believe it has already been 49 days since my loving Dad left this world.  I can’t believe I last spoke to my Dad in the hospital, since I last heard his very weak voice, since I last dined with him… since I last walked with him. I can still remember, very clearly, the phone call from my endearing brother Roland, the sight of my Dad on the hospital bed, the words spoken to me by the doctors, the chill of my Dad’s feet when I last touched and massaged him. I can remember vividly, how he struggled through the sedation, the tubes, the blood transfusion and the ventilator.  I still remember vividly, his intense desire to go home.  His hand gesture spoke louder than words.  I recalled his strong will to live despite his critically ill condition.  This is my loving Dad; he has an extraordinary fighting spirit no matter how rough things can be.

I recalled the pain and the sorrow that engulfed me when he was cremated on 5 Dec 2007… everything is so clear in my head. And I reckon I will never be able to erase any of them.  My dad is so great and all the good memories of him keep flooding back. My thoughts are all over the place right now, so many memories, so many words unspoken, and some things undone. But of all things, I remember most was my Dad’s STRONG love for all his children and his family. I must thank my dearest Dad from the bottom of my heart providing us a very good education.  I must thank my Dad for showing us what love is; my Dad had been a very loving husband to my dearest Mum for more than 60 years. I also must thank my Dad for showing us what it is to live life with vigour.He was a man who loved life. He collected miniature arts, coins and stamps. He loved music; he loved dancing; he loved traveling.  He loved gardening; he planted several mini trees in his balcony. He loved animals.  He liked dogs, cats, birds and fish.  Even when he was struggling to feed 10 mouths during our early childhood days, he still reared several dogs and birds.  One month before my Dad passed on, he was changing the filtered water in the fish- tanks so that his favourite fishes can swim happily in a clean environment.  He was seen feeding the birds in the afternoon.  Ah, my dearest Dad you have taught us to love and respect the animals too!

I am sure that with all great Rinpoches and Geshelas prayers - my Dad will receive a Precious Human Rebirth and be guided by the Three Jewels and Perfect Mahayana Gurus in all his future lives.  We had pray so hard the past 49 days and it is now the time to let him go. We strongly believe my Dad has gone to another peaceful and pure land of Amitabha – always blessed by the Great Buddhas, Dharma and Sanghas. Dearest Papa (Dad) and Gong Gong (Granddad), we know you love us all very, very much. Goodbye and we wish you a blissful journey, always blessed, protected and guided by the Three Jewels (the Great Buddha, Dharma and Sangha).    We love you, Daddy.  We love you very, very much. We love you forever and ever.